Goofs : All time greatest clichés part 2

women who run away from old life become waitresses

After running out from evil husbands or murderous hit squads they dye their hair and start slinging hash at roadside cafés. It is also a favorite thing to do if they have amnesia.


There are only 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary and those that don't.

Winning + losing a fight

One thing I absolutely hate in movies that still happens (but more prevalent in the 90s), was when good guys are fighting bad guys in more than one area, the good guys will start winning in the beginning, then when one starts to lose (which always happens), they all do. Then, one of the good guys does this awesome move and kicks a bad guy, causing the rest of the good guys to start winning again.

Like for instance, Chuck Norris and a cop are fighting people in different areas. When Walker is in the inevitable "losing" stage, so is the cop he came with, even though they are in completely different areas.

I also love the cliché where a wounded bad guy is about to hit the good guy with a sword / axe / shovel, but dies during his swing, falling to the left or right with the weapon still raised.

concerning the turnaround in the fight…

When the bad guy turns the fight around it is usually because he does something considered "dirty fighting" when the good guy turns it around for the final time it is usually out of an epiphany or rage brought about by a final taunt of the bad guy.


There are only 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary and those that don't.

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

Rolling gas cans / fire extinguishers and shooting them when they're right next to a bad guy.

At the very end of the movie, a supposedly dead villain pops up for one last attempt in slow mo, and gets blown away.

To get away in a car chase, the good guy either barely beats a train / fuel truck / big rig; or the bad guys hit something like a fruit stand or garbage cans.

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

bad guys will always attack the good guy one at a time
if there are ninjas in the movie, and they are running, they will always do at least one unnecessary front flip (I hate that!)

the alien reproduction cycle

Not just the aliens from the movie Aliens (and all its sequels) but nowadays the typical monster alien likes to lay its eggs in animals and/or humans. These eggs hatch in a matter of hours and the young grow to maturity in another 24 hours. The adult size of the creatures can range from dog size to bear. More often than not there will be multiple eggs, sometimes hundreds. This makes for a good movie but if you think about it how could any environment sustain creatures like this. They'd eat the land bare, turn on each other, then eventually just become extinct. All in about a week.


There are only 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary and those that don't.

unknown monsters never attack until you see what they can do

It happens something like this: soon to be victim(s) stumble across a dark and spooky place. They enter it for whatever reason and start to explore. Slowly they stumble across a few clues that something is wrong. And finally they find a body. It might be alive for a short while just long enough to give a useless warning of what fate awaits them before they die. That is when the monster appears and attacks. If there are more than one in the group one will die and we'll see how horrible the monster and how painful the death will be.


There are only 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary and those that don't.

Re: unknown monsters never attack until you see what they can do

The one that annoys me most is women cannot run from an assailant without falling!!!!!! Then when they do fall it takes forever to get up again.

Also similar to previous post if I was in a house and something scary happens I would be out the front door and on the phone to the police before you could say "lets check it out" I would NEVER EVER go upstairs

Re: unknown monsters never attack until you see what they can do

Haha:

Ahhhh! Oof! Ahhhhhh! Oof! Ahhhhhhh!

It's like they have to hit every freakin branch / gopher hole in the ground and fall. And also, if the girl is going to die, she always sprains her ankle and holds it in pain. I'm pretty sure you can still get up and run with that, especially since you're about to you know get killed.

It also looks completely stupid how women in movies run 2 mph, and the killer just simply walks at the same speed while she's running away. That way, he's right behind her when she falls.

Re: unknown monsters never attack until you see what they can do

And they're always wearing heels!

Why Do The Villains of The 007 Series …

always insist on killing Bond with elaborately ritualistic methods that always give 007 a chance to escape? Bond is not a pussycat to be toyed with, but rather a very dangerous tiger! If I were a 007 villain and had the good luck of trapping Bond, I would shoot him between the eyes and be done with it. Of course, if I were a 007 villain, I would not commit the mistake of trying to kill Bond from the very beginning, because that only serves to confirm 007's suspicions that the villain is indeed up to no good.

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

- In every campy action flick, there must be 1 and only 1 female bad guy. She always knows martial arts and is always in love with the Boss.

- "You'll never get away with this!"

- In the end when the hero has the bad guy by the nuts, the bad guy always reveals that he kidnapped the hero's girlfriend and he can only save one.

or, they pull the old, "we're not so different, you and I"

- When cop cars pull up to a house to arrest someone, they always do the same maneuver - where they come to a screeching stop and turn different ways.

- Whenever a character in an action flick has an illness, disability, etc. it is always forgotten about by the end of the film.

on the count of three: 1 *ARRRRR!!!!*

this little trick is used to fool those who are about to experience pain. Either they are removing a bandage, or a piece of shrapnel, or are about to get a shot. The one administering the action says "on the count of three" then the victim and he nod in agreement. But in actuality the count only goes to one.


There are only 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary and those that don't.

the one armed grab/save

a victim is toppling off a bridge, cliff, building, etc. the hero runs forward and dives at the victim at the last possible second and grabs the wrist of victim by one hand. Now how this happens without the hero getting pulled over the side too or breaking their arm or retaining their grip is beyond me but it happens time and time again.


There are only 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary and those that don't.

Re: The Drug Deal Gone Bad

For a change, I would love to see a drug deal that is totally amicable, with the buyer satisfied with the merchandise and the seller satisfied with the money he is paid, and no one trying to doublecross the other.

Re: the one armed grab/save

Along with this is when the person falling is wearing a glove, and is sliding out in a "nooooo!!!!" kind of way.

If the person lives, the person holding them always grabs down again and gets their hand.

bullets really really really hate glass

when a person is being shot at the bullets are attracted by large masses of glass. If there are bottles on a table or behind a bar or glass just laying about they will be hit. Standing in front of a huge glasspane windows will also draw the bullets away from their target. So remember folksif someone is shooting at you get near a large body of glass and cover your eyes.

and if you disagree with me then you, sir, are worse than Hitler.

I have seen the face of evil and it is us

this cliche makes me want to vomit when I see it. Usually blankets a whole group with the sins of a few while ignoring everything positive. Usually accompanied by tearjerking music and weeping woman and children. You could also include man = evil and nature = good.

and if you disagree with me then you, sir, are worse than Hitler.

Re: I have seen the face of evil and it is us

I love this one. It also has to be caused by an evil General who acts without any real reason, yet his men never question him.

"Hmmm, let's just randomly burn that village down. We don't have to, but we're clichéd and have no real personality, so let's do it!"

Thanks.

Re: I have seen the face of evil and it is us

The actual quote came from Walt Kelly's "Pogo":
"We have met the enemy, and he is us."

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

"I will find you."

There are three continents, an ocean, terrible weather, and a desert between you. Not to mention the multitudes of people that inhabit the earth (or planet you live on), and the fact that something big is seperating you in the first place, usually a baddy.


=============================================================
Koalas. They're telepathic. And, they control the weather.
=============================================================

nosebleeds in movies and on tv only last for one drop

The person with the nosebleed only touches the blood to notice it then wipes it away. I don't think I've ever seen a "gusher"

and if you disagree with me then you, sir, are worse than Hitler.

Re: nosebleeds in movies and on tv only last for one drop

I have another one sorry if someone has already said this. But if your being chased by a killer or something and you get into your car it'll take you forever to get the key in the lock. I understand that because your scared our of your mind. But once you finally get into the car. Dang, it won't start. How original.

"Abashed the Devil stood, for he saw how awful goodness was."

Re: nosebleeds in movies and on tv only last for one drop

I have two which have probably already been said, but:

1. In almost every single romance movie, there is the main girl who likes and idolizes a guy. There is another guy, who she initially finds annoying, but then, after a fight usually involving the first guy she likes, they end up together and she realizes the first guy she liked is an idiot. ALWAYS.

2. Whenever anyone gets slapped in a movie, their head gets whipped dramatically around and/or they fall to the floor. Then they slowly turn around, with their hand on their face, in disbelief (yes, you DID just get slapped). Then they wait an eternity before striking back. No one would ever do that in real life. It MAKES NO SENSE.



Just because I like balletdoesn't mean I'm a poof, you know.

R.I.P. Jack Wild

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

one i can think of is in almost ANY comedy or not even a comedy, a drama or any genre.. there is always some stupid clumsy best friend of the main character who always screws something up or thinks of something whitty to say at the exact time, in the worst circumstances or something (IE: cloverfeild, national treasure)

another would be, a bunch of underdog kids from the bronx get a new sports coach and have to overcome emotional hardships and win some sort of championship

dead guys in chairs

a person enters a room and to talk to someone who is sitting in a chair with their backs to the door. Some times the person who enters gives a little speech or a confession. But when there is no answer they go over and turn the chair (it swivels) or touches the person who then promptly topples out of the chair dead. They usually have a look of horror on their dead face or sometimes they've been dead so long their is no flesh left on their face.

and if you disagree with me then you, sir, are worse than Hitler.

The 46 Laws of Anime

I haven't watched Anime in a long time (in fact not since they used to call it Japanimation which was a very long time ago) but I stumbled across this website: http://www.abcb.com/laws/index.htm which laid out some rules of Anime (46 rules). I can't tell you who the names (contributer most likely) are but I'm copying and pasting everything. It is very humorous and very real.

1. Law of Metaphysical Irregularity

The normal laws of physics do not apply.



2. Law of Differentiated Gravitation

Whenever someone or something jumps, is thrown, or otherwise is rendered airborn, gravity is reduced by a factor of 4.



3. Law of Sonic Amplification, First Law of Anime Acoustics

In space, loud sounds, like explosions, are even louder because there is no air to get in the way.



4. Law of Constant Thrust, First Law of Anime Motion

In space, constant thrust equals constant velocity.



5. Law of Mechanical Mobility, Second Law of Anime Motion

The larger a mechanical device is, the faster it moves. Armored Mecha are the fastest objects known to human science.



6. Law of Temporal Variability

Time is not a constant. Time stops for the hero whenever he does something 'cool' or 'impressive'. Time slows down when friends and lovers are being killed and speeds up whenever there is a fight.



7. First Law of Temporal Mortality

'Good Guys' and 'Bad Guys' both die in one of two ways. Either so quick they don't even see it coming, OR it's a long drawn out affair where the character gains much insight to the workings of society, human existence or why the toast always lands butter side down.



8. Second Law of Temporal Mortality

It takes some time for bad guys to die regardless of physical damage. Even when the 'Bad Guys' are killed so quickly they didn't even see it coming, it takes them a while to realize they are dead. This is attributed to the belief that being evil damages the Reality Lobe of the brain.



9. Law of Dramatic Emphasis

Scenes involving extreme amounts of action are depicted with either still-frames or black screens with a slash of bright color (usually red or white).



10. Law of Dramatic Multiplicity

Scenes that only happen once, for instance, a 'Good Guy' kicks the 'Bad Guy' in the face, are seen at least 3 times from 3 different angles.



11. Law of Inherent Combustability

Everything explodes. Everything.

First Corollary - Anything that explodes bulges first.

Second Corollary - Large cities are the most explosive substances known to human science. Tokyo in particular seems to be the most unstable of these cities, sometimes referred to as "The Matchstick City".



12. Law of Phlogistatic Emission

Nearly all things emit light from fatal wounds.



13. Law of Energetic Emission

There is alway an energy build up (commonly referred to as an energy 'bulge') before Mecha or space craft weapons fire. Because of the explosive qualities of weapons, it is believed that this is related to the Law of Inherent Combustability.



14. Law of Inverse Lethal Magnitude

The destructive potential of a weapon is inversly proportional to its size.

First Corollary - Small and cute will always overcome big and ugly. Also know as the A-Ko phenomenon.



15. Law of Inexhaustability

No one *EVER* runs out of ammunition. That is of course unless they are cornered, out-numbered, out-classed, and unconscious.



16. Law of Inverse Accuracy

The accuracy of a 'Good Guy' when operating any form of fire-arm increases as the difficulty of the shot increases. The accuracy of the 'Bad Guys' when operating fire-arms decreases when the difficulty of the shot decreases. (Also known as the Stormtrooper Effect)

Example: A 'Good Guy' in a drunken stupor being held upside down from a moving vehicle will always hit, and several battalions of 'Bad Guys' firing on a 'Good Guy' standing alone in the middle of an open field will always miss.

First Corollary - The more 'Bad Guys' there are, the less likely they will hit anyone or do any real damage.

Second Corollary - Whenever a 'Good Guy' is faced with insurmountable odds, the 'Bad Guys' line up in neat rows, allowing the hero to take them all out with a single burst of automatic fire and then escape.

Third Corollary - Whenever a 'Good Guy' is actually hit by enemy fire, it is in a designated 'Good Guy Area', usually a flesh wound in the shoulder or arm, which restricts the 'Good Guy' from doing anything more strenuous than driving, firing weaponry, using melee weapons, operating heavy machinery, or doing complex martial arts maneuvres.



17. Law of Transient Romantic Unreliability

Minmei is a bimbo.



18. Law of Hemoglobin Capacity

The human body contains over 12 gallons of blood, sometimes more, under high pressure.



19. Law of Demonic Consistency

Demons and other supernatural creatures have at least three eyes, loads of fangs, tend to be yellow-green or brown (but black is not unknown), and can only be hurt by bladed weapons.



20. Law of Militaristic Unreliability

Huge galaxy-wide armadas, entire armies, and large war-machines full of cruel, heartless, bloodthirsty warriors can be stopped and defeated with a single insignificant example of a caring/loving emotion or a song.



21. Law of Tactical Unreliability

Tactical geniuses aren't.



22. Law of Inconsequential Undetectability

People never notice the little things Like missing body parts, or wounds the size of Seattle.



23. Law of Juvenile Intellectuality

Children are smarter than adults. And almost always twice as annoying.



24. Law of Americanthropomorphism

Americans in Anime appear in one of two roles, either as a really nasty skinny 'Bad Guy' or a big stupid 'Good Guy'.

First Corollary - The only people who are more stupid than the big dumb Americans are the American translators. (Sometimes referred to as the Green Line Effect.)

Second Corollary - The only people who are more stupid than the American translators are the American editors and censors.



25. Law of Mandibular Proportionality

(from A. Hicks)

The size of a person's mouth is directly proportional to the volume at which they are speaking or eating.



26. Law of Feline Mutation

(from A. Hicks)

Any half-cat/half-human mutation will invariably:

be female,
will possess ears and sometimes a tail as a genetic mutation,
and wear as little clothing as possible, if any.


27. Law of Conservation of Firepower

(from U. Williams)

Any powerful weapon capable of destroying/defeating an opponent in a single shot will invariably be reserved and used only as a last resort.



28. Law of Technological User-Benevolence

(from U. Williams)

The formal training required to operate a spaceship or mecha is inversely proportional to its complexity.



29. Law of Melee Luminescence

(from U. Williams)

Any being displaying extremely high levels of martial arts prowess and/or violent emotions emits light in the form of a glowing aura. This aura is usually blue for 'good guys' and red for 'bad guys'. This is attributed to Good being higher in the electromagnetic spectrum than Evil.



30. Law of Non-anthropomorphic Antagonism

(from U. Williams)

All ugly, non-humanoid alien races are hostile, and usually hell-bent on destroying humanity for some obscure reason.



31. Law of Follicular Chroma Variability

(from Spellweaver)

Any color in the visible spectrum is considered a natural hair color. This color can change without warning or explanation.



32. Law of Follicular Permanence

Hair in anime is pretty much indestructable, and can resist any amount of meteorological conditions, energy emissions, physical abuse, or explosive effects and still look perfect. The only way to hurt someone's hair is the same way you deal with demons with bladed weapons!



33. Law of Topological Aerodynamics, First Law of Anime Aero-Dynamics

*ANY* shape, no matter how convoluted or odd-looking, is automatically aerodynamic.



34. Law of Probable Attire

Clothing in anime follows certain predictable guidelines.

Female characters wear as little clothing as possible, regardless of whether it is socially or meteorologically appropriate. Any female with an excessive amount of clothing will invariably have her clothes ripped to shreds or torn off somehow. If there is no opportunity to tear off the afore-mentioned female's clothes, then she will inexplicably take a shower for no apparent reason (also known as the Gratuitous Shower Scene).

Whenever there is a headwind, a Male characters will invariably wear a long cloak which doesn't hamper movement and billows out dramatically behind him.

First Corollary (Cryo-Adaptability) - All anime characters are resistant to extremely cold temperatures, and do not need to wear heavy or warm clothing in snow.

Second Corollary (Indecent Invulnerability) - Bikinis render the wearer invulnerable to any form of damage.



35. Law of Musical Omnipotence

Any character capable of musical talent (singing, playing an instrument, etc.) is automatically capable of doing much more "simple" things like piloting mecha, fighting crime, stopping an intergalactic war, and so on especially if they have never attempted these things before.



36. Law of Quitupular Aggultination

(from Daniel Mikula)

Also called "The Five-man Rule," when "Good Guys" group together, it tends to be in groups of five. There are five basic positions, which are:


The Hero/Leader
His girlfriend
His Best Friend/Rival
A Hulking Brute
A Dwarf/Kid

Between these basic positions are distributed several attributes, which include:


Extreme Coolness
Amazing intelligence
Incredible Irritation



37. Law of Extradimensional Capacitance

(from Jason Bustard)

All anime females have an extradimensional storage space of variable volume somewhere on their person from which they can instantly retrieve any object at a moment's notice.

First Corollary (The Hammer Rule) - The most common item stored is a heavy mallet, which can be used with unerring accuracy on any male who deserves it. Other common items include costumes/uniforms, power suits/armor, and large bazookas.



38. Law of Hydrostatic Emission

Eyes tend to be rather large in Anime. This is because they contain several gallons of water, which may be instantaneously released at high pressure through large tear ducts. The actual volume of water contained in the eyes is unknown, as there is no evidence to suggest that these reservoirs are actually capable of running out. The reason water tends to collect in the eyes is because Anime characters only have one large sweat gland, which is located at the back of the head. When extremely stressed, embarrassed, or worried, this sweat gland exudes a single but very large drop of sebaceous fluid.



39. Law of Inverse Attraction

Success at finding suitable mates is inversely proportionate to how desperately you want to be successful. The more you want, the less you get.

First Corollary Unfortunately, this law seems to apply to Otaku in the real world



40. Law of Nasal Sanguination

(from Ryan Pritchard and Jason Aylen)

When sexually aroused, males in Anime don't get erections, they get nosebleeds. No one's sure why this is, though the current theory suggests that larger eyes means smaller sinuses and thinner sinus tissue (see Law #38 above). Females don't get nosebleeds, but invariably get one heck of a blush along the cheeks and across the nose, suggesting a lot of bloodflow to that region.



41. Law of Xylolaceration

(from Lyndon Harris)

Wooden or bamboo swords are just as sharp as metal swords, if not sharper.



42. Law of Juvenile Omnipotence

(from Erin Alia)

Always send a boy to do a man's job. He'll get it done in half the time and twice the angst.



43. Law of Quadrotriscadecophobia

There is no Law #43.



44. Law of Nominative Clamovocation

(from Luiko-Ysabeth and Adrian Hsiah)

The likelihood of success and damage done by a martial arts attack is directly proportional to the volume at which the full name of the attack is announced.



45. Law of Uninteruptable Metamorphosis

(from R. A. Hubby)

Regardless of how long or involved the transformation sequence or how many times they've seen it before, any 'Bad Guys' witnessing a mecha/hero/heroine transforming are too stunned to do anything to interrupt it.



46. Law of Flimsy Incognition

(from Conrad Knauer)

Simply changing into a costume or wearing a teensy mask can make you utterly unrecognizable to even your closest friends and relatives.


and if you disagree with me then you, sir, are worse than Hitler.

the dead person who isn't

the hero or heroes of the story approaches a person who appears to be dead. The dead person doesn't react to any speech or touch. But just when everyone agrees that the person is dead the dead person will jolt upright causing everyone to jump backwards and scream.

and if you disagree with me then you, sir, are worse than Hitler.

Amnesia

It's the perfect little situation where little bits of information are leaked to the audience and a character of the story where both can experience the surprise.

To quote Cubert of Futurama: This show is awesome! When I grow up I'm gonna have so much amnesia!

and if you disagree with me then you, sir, are worse than Hitler.

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

Every teenager has a convertable, and they're never in their seats when the car is moving.

Every action-shooter post 2000 involves a government conspiracy.

All detectives wear suspenders and smoke cigars.

The bomb always ticks down to 0:01, and just when it's about to explode, it turns off. It has enough power to make a turning off noise for 2 seconds after it turns off, but not detonate.

Someone's about to be hanged, but as they fall, a bullet hits the rope slicing it in half.


Thanks.

The Immortal

More into the scifi/fantasy genre we have the guy who has lived for a very long time. Very often we have him remembering what happened hundreds of years ago and how it ties into his life now. Off the top of my head I remember The Highlander (both movies and tv series), Angel, and Amsterdam. I seem to remember some others that deal with vampires but am not entirely sure of their names. I think they were police detectives.

and if you disagree with me then you, sir, are worse than Hitler.

Spinning Newspaper

Any genre: This just in!

The screen shows the paper spin toward the screen and shows a news story.

Thanks.

Re: Spinning Newspaper

yes it has been such a cliché that they mock it now. Recently I saw it Scrubs where they had a person spinning a newspaper on a stick.

and if you disagree with me then you, sir, are worse than Hitler.

Re: Spinning Newspaper

I hate this one: a woman/love interest has been captured by the hero. The hero comes out of his hiding spot, the villian tells the hero to drop his gun and/or slide it "over here". If the hero just drops it, when the villain gets ready to kill the girl, he makes an awesome move with his foot which propels the gun into his hands, allowing him to kill the villain. (But assuming he slides the gun over to the villain) The girl shouts "Don't do it (whatever his name is)! Don't listen to him! Shoot him!" The bad guy then hits her which makes her slump to the ground unconscious usually until the hand-to-hand combat is over between the hero and the villian.

Example:
Vinny: "I've got a knife to her throat. Come out with your hands up and surrender. . . or she dies!"
Sara: "Don't do it Rick!"
vinny: "Shut up stupid brat!" (Smack to the head)
Rick: ". . ."
Vinny: "Drop your gun and slide it over to me."
(rick listens)
sara: "no! why'd you do that!"
Rick: "I'm sorry."
(vinny takes butt of gun and knocks sara out)
vinny: "sucks for her."
Rick: "you will pay for this."
(a slew of kicks, punches, and highly stylized grapple moves ensue the next few minutes. With a daring and acrobatic finish, the villain is dead)
Rick: "your alive."
Sara: "did you get him?"
Rick: "yeah. now let's go home."

2007-The year in movies!
You Can't See Me! (Well, technically)

Re: Spinning Newspaper

also: if there is a big explosion or fire, the hero, usually accompanied by a companion of some sort, run in slo-mo and always, i mean ALWAYS end up jumping into the camera or off the side of the screen. debris and fireballs are everywhere. when it shows them in normal motion, there are fireballs and debris all around them, yet not one piece managed to hit them.

2007-The year in movies!
You Can't See Me! (Well, technically)

Re: Spinning Newspaper

It's a cliche associated with 1940s films.

There was one comedy film which had the spinning-newspaper headlines, and the last one, when it stopped spinning, was showing the back page of the paper, with an underwear ad then a hand reaches in and turns it over, revealing the headline.

edit: that was "Strange Brew."

What is so goddamned funny?

I can't believe no one has mentioned this yet. Wherewhere is it written that the (fill in the blank):


Mad Scientist, Criminal Mastermind, Bond Supervillian, Marauding Cyborg, Crazed Serial killer, Evil Demon, et. al. must always engage in maniacal laughter? An example from Legend:



Princess Lily: "You are nothing but an animal!"

The Lord of Darkness: [laughs] "We are all animals m'lady.mwahahahahahamwahahahahaa!!!"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=616PgQCUcp0&feature=related



"Stick with me baby, and you'll be fartin' thru silk!"

Re: What is so goddamned funny?

>> Mad Scientist, Criminal Mastermind, Bond Supervillian, Marauding Cyborg,
>> Crazed Serial killer, Evil Demon, et. al. must always engage in maniacal
>> laughter? An example from Legend:

>> Princess Lily: "You are nothing but an animal!"

>> The Lord of Darkness: [laughs] "We are all animals m'lady.
>> mwahahahahahamwahahahahaa!!!"

Yeah, but, in 'Legend' it is Tim Curry as "The Lord of Darkness" and Tim has such a wonderful maniacal laugh!!!

"I'm flying high, defying gravity!"

Love and Light,
Angela Theresa Collins

oh no, the [fill in blank] is damaged!

One of us is going to have to stay behind to operate it. And that will most certainly mean yourDEATH!!!

This act of bravery can happen with anything from holding a door open or setting off bomb. Once in a while the person staying behind actually lives for some reason or other but that only happens when the sacrifice is done for young love. Love of fathers, mothers, nor children will work.

and if you disagree with me then you, sir, are worse than Hitler.

Re: oh no, the [fill in blank] is damaged!

someone always says: "Don't look down!"
and guess what? they do. every time.
it nevers fails to amaze


2007-The year in movies!
You Can't See Me! (Well, technically)

Re: Is London the only place that exists in the UK??

that comes from the larger idea that when various locations are shown around the world they usually are around easily identifiable landmarks. Big Ben in England, the Eiffel Tower in France, pyramids in Egypt, etc.

and if you disagree with me then you, sir, are worse than Hitler.

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

If a character is presumably killed by a gun over a telephone or walkie-talkie, you will soon find out that the character is actually alive.

-Last Four-
Brazil 9/10
Jackie Brown 5/10
Magnolia 7/10
Indiana Jones: KCS 3/10

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

When a car is driving over a cliff, it often explodes in mid air before it hits the ground. That doesn't make any sense.

Also, in any type of movie, the main character tries to explain an element of the main plot, (eg. the monsters are coming alive!) but nobody believes him. Also, he may try to recreate it, but it will fail in front of the person he's trying to show, but comes to life, etc when he or she leaves.

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

School football (and basketball, for that matter) movies stink to high heaven. And they seem to keep grinding out a new one every dang month!

They always end up as seniors, during the prom season, fighting over chicks (who are 28 but are playing 18 year olds) and starring in the "big game" - which they always win by that last second, quadruple overtime, slow-motion pass to the receiver (or shot in the basket).

Such cliched films obviously keep being made in order for the government to mind-control kids to join school sports, then the ROTC and then the military - to steal oil from innocent foreign countries. (Wouldn't be surprised to find that Spielberg and company get tons of government funding.)

Yes, Big Brother certainly has his little robot cannon fodder units well-covered, from the cradle to the grave!

.

The Countdown

Writers love this cliché. Something horrible is going to happen or someone is going to die. A random scientist or "professional" makes a guess on how long it will take for this horrible thing will happen. Now this time period becomes law. People check their watches or sometimes there is even a huge clock counting down for effect.

and if you disagree with me then you, sir, are worse than Hitler.

Men can't open jars

A wife or girlfriend bring a jar of pickles (or something similar) to her man to open it. He'll grunt and strain and his face will turn red. He'll bang the jar on the counter and try again and again. Then a female friend of the wife or a small child will come in and take the jar away from the man and open it with no problem. The man will then make a lame excuse about how he "loosened it up."

and if you disagree with me then you, sir, are worse than Hitler.

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

The bad guy or evil general always sends his entire army or does something that falls right into the hero's plans. For example, sending an entire army when the good guys are retreating, so all of the bad guys get killed and the tides turn when they walk right into an ambush.

Along with this, the hero's master plan at the end is always based on the bad guy having a flaw in his plan, even though its against all tactics, such as having your army get beat, retreat, and hope that the evil General is dumb enough to send his entire army to "finish them then and there."

'we got to save the [insert building here]!!!'

Usually this story line revolves around kids or liberals. The solution is often declaring it a historical landmark or bringing in some celebrity/singer to rouse the public into action. The building usually is going to be torn down for a mall, parking lot, car dealership, etc. Either way the person doing it will be portrayed as evil and greedy.

and if you disagree with me then you, sir, are worse than Hitler.

Re: 'we got to save the [insert building here]!!!'

Only perfect-looking actors can play the main protagonists. Anyone not size zero/beautifuletc, ie, has weight issues/glasses/irregular features, will be the villain or funny side-kick.

Re: 'we got to save the [insert building here]!!!'

Nobody that is called ugly in movies is ever ugly. They may in fact be just as beautiful as the "beautiful" people that are often their antagonizers. It makes no sense.
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