Goofs : All time greatest clichés part 2

I have some important information but I can't tell you over the phone

If a informant says that line he's going to die at the hands of baddies. But his death will allow the hero to further investigate what is going on and eventually learn why the informant died.


There are only 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary and those that don't.

Re: I have some important information but I can't tell you over the phone

In a similar vein:
The villain lures the cops away from the witness/informant they are protecting and the villain sneaks in and kills the victim. And nobody sees the killer leave the room either.

Re: I have some important information but I can't tell you over the phone

In any B movie, about a former military type.

The Hero is always some kind of special forces, never a grunt, private, peon

All the bad guys, hired thugs, mercenaries, can't never ever hit the hero, even if the hero is up against 500 mercenaries

The Hero always find a pistol with unlimited amount of bullets regarless of him killing 500 people without needeing to reload

The Bad guy always tells the hero, his plot, scheme, eppiphany, secret amd where the hidden bomb is.

The Hero always finds the bomb with 10 seconds left and cuts the right wire with 1 second left to spare

The Hero can always shoot the trunk of a vehical and blows up the vehical

The bad guys hires trained ninjas, assasins, martial artists, and the hero kills them all with his bare hands.

The Hero's gun is jammed just as a big brute is charging towards him, and then mircalously the gun unjams and the brute is killed. The Hero lets out a sigh of relief.

The villians are super smart breaking into a building, circumventing all security procedures, faking ID/Pass cards, but they never get away and are killed by the Hero.

The Hero can use two metal pieces to pick any kind of door lock.

The Hero given or told some sage advice, that becomes the remedy in the end with either a flash back or a ghostly voice over reminding him.

The Hero gets beaten up by the villian, and with 1 week of training, he kills someone who has been a master of what ever arts, guns, martial, archery, knives, etc for years

The Hero can punch through glass and open the door without being injured.

The Hero can speed through any street, highway, countryside, and not get pulled over by a cop for speeding.

The Hero is always smarter than any local lawman

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

in tv shows or movies about teens in school they bearly spend any time in class and their doing something for like 20 min. Where did they get that time!

and also its always the vice princepal they talk to where is the princepal

and the movies with a nerdy girl she ALWAYS used to be best friends with the popular girl and now they hate each other

The discovery that could change the world

They could discover the cure for cancer, the last dinosaur, or a lost city but if it could change the world it will be destroyed or lost. I cross my fingers hoping that the discovery will survive simply because I want to see the writers deal with a changed world. But things always snap back so next week everything will be the same.


There are only 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary and those that don't.

English Villains

All action films have an English arch villain. Not only that but they are well dressed, well educated, well spoken, in fact they look like the last people on the planet that need to rob a bank/Nakatomi Plaza/Catholic church.

Examples include: DieHard, Gone in 60 Seconds, Da Vinci Code..


My brother's sister's cousin never said anything about bars.

Re: English Villains

Alan Rickman's character in Die Hard is German. He even speaks auf Deutsch in a few scenes.

Re: English Villains

How about the cliche' where German officers speak with a British Accent!

Re: English Villains

If it is an American movie about anything thing in Europe, especially a period piece, everyone will have English accents.

Enemy at the Gates is the worst of this (although the movie was great). The "Russians" with British accents (Jude Law et al) and the Ed Harris Nazi character's American accent. Nice!! I think some of the extras had "real" accents though.

Don't forget Valkyrie (2008)!

I eat.

Re: English Villains


If it is an American movie about anything thing in Europe, especially a period piece, everyone will have English accents.

Enemy at the Gates is the worst of this (although the movie was great). The "Russians" with British accents (Jude Law et al) and the Ed Harris Nazi character's American accent. Nice!! I think some of the extras had "real" accents though.

Don't forget Valkyrie (2008)!


If a film isn't going to be presented in a native language and subtitled, I much prefer the actors just speak normally as opposed to faking the accent of whatever nationality. If you want realism, speak the language and use subtitles. If you don't care for subtitles, just act.

The best handling of this that I can recall was in The Hunt For Red October, they obviously wanted realism but didn't want to have subtitles. The film starts with the Russians speaking Russian but has an extreme closeup transition from subtitled Russian to English. It tells the viewer, "These guys are speaking Russian, but for your convenience we will translate it to English for you".

Brilliant.

On the opposite side, and somehow still about Russia and submarines, is K-19. This film forces the actors to take on atrocious Russian accents for no logical reason.

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

The master villain always wears black outfits, unless he is a drug lord, in which case he will always be wearing a white or off-white tuxedo.

Despite having loads of money, and having carefully built his plans and spared no expense in training and arming his henchmen, in actual battle they will always turn out to be incompetent goons who couldn't hit a battleship with a laser-guided homing missile from twenty feet away. Even though there are hundreds of them, the hero, his sidekick (and in modern movies, the Pretty Girl who can fight like Bruce Lee) will trash all of them in minutes.

Corollary: the bad guys always fight under strict martial discipline in military order, while the hero's team will always be insubordinate rebels who trust to luck and fight like cowboys. Yet they still manage to mow down the enemy in droves with only minor loss to themselves. Even if some good characters die in a melee, the kill-ratio will always be at least 10 to 1.

Another cliche I've noticed is that the villain's henchmen, other than his immediate aides, will nearly always be wearing some kind of helmet or mask that conceals their faces, or at least their eyes. Perhaps this is so the audience doesn't identify with them as human beings and consider the hero might be a swine for slaughtering men who could be fathers and husbands.

your last point….

I was of the opinion that the reason they wore helmets or masks that conceal their faces was so they could kill them several times over instead of shelling out extra bucks for extras.


There are only 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary and those that don't.

Interesting things about computers in movies/tv

25 Interesting Things That You Learn About Computers in The Movies
1. Word processors never display a cursor.

2. You never have to use the spacebar when typing long sentences.

3. All monitors display 2 inch high letters.

4. High-tech computers, such as those used by NASA, the CIA, or some such governmental institution, have easy-to-understand graphical interfaces.

5. Those that don't will have incredibly powerful text-based command shells that can correctly understand and execute commands typed in plain English.

6. Corollary: You can gain access to any information you want by simply typing "ACCESS ALL OF THE SECRET FILES" on any keyboard.

7. Likewise, you can infect a computer with a destructive virus by simply typing "UPLOAD VIRUS." Viruses cause temperatures in computers, just like they do in humans. After a while, smoke billows out of disk drives and monitors.

8. All computers are connected. You can access the information on the villain's desktop computer, even if it's turned off.

9. Powerful computers beep whenever you press a key or whenever the screen changes. Some computers also slow down the output on the screen so that it doesn't go faster than you can read. The *really* advanced ones also emulate the sound of a dot-matrix printer as the characters come across the screen.

10. All computer panels have thousands of volts and flash pots just underneath the surface. Malfunctions are indicated by a bright flash, a puff of smoke, a shower of sparks, and an explosion that forces you backward. See #7, above)

11. People typing away on a computer will turn it off without saving the data.

12. A hacker can get into the most sensitive computer in the world before intermission and guess the secret password in two tries.

13. Any PERMISSION DENIED has an OVERRIDE function.

14. Complex calculations and loading of huge amounts of data will be accomplished in under three seconds. In the movies, modems transmit data at two gigabytes per second.

15. When the power plant/missile site/whatever overheats, all the control panels will explode, as will the entire building.

16. If you display a file on the screen and someone deletes the file, it also disappears from the screen. There are no ways to copy a backup file and there are no undelete utilities.

17. If a disk has got encrypted files, you are automatically asked for a password when you try to access it.

18. No matter what kind of computer disk it is, it'll be readable by any system you put it into. All application software is usable by all computer platforms.

19. The more high-tech the equipment, the more buttons it has. However, everyone must have been highly trained, because the buttons aren't labelled.

20. Most computers, no matter how small, have reality-defying three-dimensional, real-time, photo-realistic animated graphics capability.

21. Laptops, for some strange reason, always seem to have amazing real-time video phone capabilities and the performance of a CRAY-MP.

22. Whenever a character looks at a VDU, the image is so bright that it projects itself onto his/her face.

23. Computers never crash during key, high-intensity activities. Humans operating computers never make mistakes under stress.

24. Programs are fiendishly perfect and never have bugs that slow down users.

25. Any photograph can have minute details pulled out of it. You can zoom into any picture as far as you want to. Example: "What's that fuzzy thing in the corner? I don't know, let's check. It's the murder weapon! Let's look under the bed for the killers shoes. no, just some comics books (Marvel 1954, very rare). Let's check the closet shelves!"



There are only 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary and those that don't.

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

"Any photograph can have minute details pulled out of it. You can zoom into any picture as far as you want to."

Example: Blade Runner, The X-Files.

That annoys me about as much as when someone hears something interesting on a tape and manages to rewind it exactly to that point every time.


No Mercy. No Shame. No Signature.

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

Photos aren't that big a deal, especially if the enhancement is from a negative. It's the use of video enhancement technology that is rather silly.

Re: hahahahaha - a few more

When using a search engine you have to use the word "find" in front.

Re: hahahahaha - a few more

They never, and I mean ever, use a mouse. I understand that practically everything on a computer can be accomplished using only the keyboard, but somewhere along the lines it went wrong. I would be willing to say that most people use the mouse at least once during their daily rutine on a computer, but that is never depicted in films.

"There will be a reckoning you will not live long enough to never forget." - The Way of the Gun

Re: Interesting things about computers in movies/tv

ZOOM, ENHANCE!

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

In the cops and robbers type movie, the lead detective is on his third marriage, and it's on shakey ground.

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

Very true indeed. At lealst they don't have the typical cliche where they are eating donuts and drinking coffee.

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

Reality Shows now fall into cliches as well. Look at American Idol-one of the judges is a guy from England who is extremely harsh/critical. Now look at "America's Got Talent", that inventor show, "Grease, the Musical", "So you think you can dance", The other dance show competition: They all have a "Simon" like character! Gee, not very originial! And speaking of no originality: Now there's a Pirate based reality show..come on, give me a break! And yet, thousands and thousands of wanna be's show up to audition, apparently un-aware of all the other show producers' hidden agenda to humilate and embarass contestants on national Tv. I guess all those that show up to audition, don't watch the other reality shows. Either that, or don't read the contract and just want a quick 15 minutes of fame. Gag me please! In my opinion, that's pretty much the routine on all the reality shows: humiliate and embarass the contestants, use their likeness and image for all eternity with no further compensation, sign them to a very strict and binding contract, and then say "see you later". Gee, how nice!

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

I saw a "forshadowing" type of cliche in Patriot Games last night. In the scene where Harrison Ford and the bad guy are fighting on the boat, and the anchor gets stuck in the deck. There is a rack focus onto the sharpe anchor and then of course Sean Bean falls onto it. I've notice this in other movies as well. It's a brief shot, but gives you notice of the danger element. Oh, and I guess boats will continue going in the same direction with no one at the wheel, at high speed, during stormy weather and waves.

the inspirational word

When faced with a problem a group of protagonists sit around and try to figure out how to solve it. One of the group usually makes a comment or a joke and then another of the group says "That's it!!!" The comment is meaningless by itself but it sparks off an idea to save the day.
I just recently saw this happen in the new movie Fantastic Four: Rise of the Surfer. If you've seen it you'll know what I mean when I say "I can already feel your pulse dropping"


There are only 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary and those that don't.

Re: the inspirational word

You can turn a TV on at any time and it will be on exactly at the point you need it to be, like a news report.

The girl victim will have high heels and will be running while the killer is walking slowly, the girl trips, limps along, killer will always catch up and kill the victim.

"You turn on the fan, you're getting a detention."-B. Rose

Re: the inspirational word

ah the Pepe Lepue chase scene laugh.gif


There are only 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary and those that don't.

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

The way all camera flashguns, no matter the size, all make an exceptionally loud "whine" noise when they recharge. (You'd be hard-pressed to hear this whine in real life, but they over-emphasize the noise)

Sledge
"Stick: A boomerang that doesn't work"
http://tinyurl.com/pjph9

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

people never reload, they can wander through the film wih the same gun (rambo, any james bond or generic action movie).

Also, if the Hero is unarmed he will always find a gun at the last possible second a kill the Hunter/Killer?Baddie




Mongoosexxx doesn't just walk on water, Mongoosexxx breakdances on it

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

LOL, these are great. I already posted two of these in another thread but i think i'll put them here too for the hell of it.

- A cops last day on the job before retirement is always his most dangerous and lethal.

- When knocking a guard out and stealing his outfit, it will almost always fit perfectly.

- In a horror (or sometimes action/thriller movies), when trying to escape an approaching enemy in a car or bike, despite multiple attempts the vehicle will not start until the enemy is a few feet away from it.

- No matter how horrible, disturbing or terrifying a situation is (example: a monster just devoured their friends etc) if a man and a woman are alone at any point, a romance story will blossom and they will find some random place to have sex, despite the fact they don't know each other at all.

- When a villain has a gun pointed at the hero, we'll hear a gunshot, but the hero doesn't drop down, the villain falls to the floor dead, the camera then reveals someone else in the background who shot the villain from behind just in the nick of time.

- In any action film when gunshots send people flying backwards several feet. (example: Trinity shooting the agent point blank in the head in The Matrix) This doesn't happen at all, if someone gets shot they simply drop to the floor or fall over, if the shot was powerful enough to send someone flying then the blast from the gun should send the shooter flying back several feet too.

- In teenage comedies like American Pie for example, a male virgin is capable of having sex for several minutes when realistically they would shoot their load in seconds.

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

Best answers yet :) ^

emerging through an explosion

this mostly only happens with planes and spaceships. They fire their guns at a target without veering in the slightest and the target then explodes into pieces so small the plane/spaceship can emerge through the explosion without any damage. It looks pretty cool and that's why it's used over and over.


There are only 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary and those that don't.

Ramming speed!

Usually an act of desperation when guns are out of ammo or commission. A ship or airplane accepts its loss over destroying the objective. More often than not to save other lives.
I'm not quite sure what speed ramming speed is but I suppose it's somewhere high enough to do maximum damage vs actually maintaining a good chance of hitting the destination.


There are only 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary and those that don't.

Re: Ramming speed!

Maybe Ramming speed is a little slower than "Super Ludicrous speed".

Freedom isn't free
Support the troops

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

Irrespective of time of day or night, when someone's front doorbell is rung, the door will open within 3 seconds as though the occupant waits 24hours a day behind it.

If the hero has just missed the last train with his loved one aboard/must reach destination before morning/apology to make to son etc, the way-past-retirement-age booking clerk will always say, "If you run you might just catch it.." And he does.

Mainly in 70s movies - if you are looking for someone in a mass crowd like a football match or a busy street etc, the hero's eyes suddenly develop telephoto abilities and crash zoom DIRECTLY onto the person they are looking for.

Anybody can drive oversized vehicles like trucks or buses perfectly, without ever having had any experience of driving such things in their life.

Again mainly 70s - TV mystery movies - if Robert Culp is in it, it was him. Murder, theft, treason - he's the Culprit.

Well, what if there is no tomorrow? There wasn't one today

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

Presents/gifts are wrapped top and bottom separately so that cover can lift off easily with no awkward time-consuming tearing of wrapping paper

Where a likeable secondary character meets an untimely death, the scene just before he dies will portray him/her in a poignant, sentimental light

Beauty, brains and a complete psycopath. My dream girl.

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

"this is the snapshot from the security video"
"oh darn! a blurry picture"
"just wait a second,
[click] [click] [zoom] [click] [zoom]
VOILA!
a high-quality image!!
oh look! there's the face of the killer on it too!!"
"yaaay!!" [everyone cheer]



oH slugger!!
slug anyone?

shooting the invincible monster/alien

I always find this one funny. The army, navy, airforce, and marines are dispatched to fight and invincible monster/alien and everything they throw at it doesn't even make the monster flinch. The military sees this and keeps on shooting their useless weapons. They get stomped, ripped, set on fire, and disintegrated. So the reaction isSEND IN MORE TROOPS!


There are only 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary and those that don't.

Re: shooting the invincible monster/alien

Well, in fairness, that's pretty much what the real military did from 1914 to 1918.

Re: shooting the invincible monster/alien

(and our current military is doing today still)

Sledge
"Stick: A boomerang that doesn't work"
http://tinyurl.com/pjph9

Re: shooting the invincible monster/alien

That's a fking lie Sledge and you know it. We are the ones winningand how the hell do you think we won during WWII dumbass?

Law? WHERE'S THE LAW NOW!!??!!-Burt Reynolds; Deliverance.

Re: shooting the invincible monster/alien

Wow, you are cocky.


I *beep* your mom. Twice.

Re:

All dogs are named 'Lucky'.


All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy

Re: shooting the invincible monster/alien

Maybe this has been posted, but the one I cant stand is the freaky island natives. It is so horribly popular these days, especially in horror moviesthe group of party-happy young adults goes on vacation to a beautiful island in wherever, and suddenly out of nowhere pops the dark skinned, silent, super-creepy island natvies. IMO, once you see island natvies you should get the hell out of their. King Kong, The Ruins, and Touristas, just to name a few.

Another one, mostly in t.v shows, is the new-student-introduction. Usually the teacher will bring the new student up to the front of the class and say "Class, this is ________, they moved here from ______. _______, why dont you tell the class a bit about yourself?" I dont know about other schools, but in mine the teacher just points to the student and says their name or sometimes doesnt even introduce them!

Come visit your good friend Sweenyevil1.gif

the slowly disappearing shield

this one is usually meant to be funny. Two opponents face off and one of them has a sword, sometimes a chainsaw (usually the bad guy). The good guy picks up something to ward off the attack. It can be a chair or a stick or another sword. But the bad guy is either really good or really strong so when he swings his sword the 'shield' gets smaller and smaller. The fight will even stop for a second so the good guy can gape at his ever shrinking defense.


There are only 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary and those that don't.

the bottomless monster

I'm watching Supergator (a scifi original! which means low budget)at the moment and it reminded me of all the movies where a monster despite it's size will just keep eating and eating and eating humans. The supergator is 20-25' in length but so far it has eaten 25-30 people. It's still running around eating people. I suspect it will keep doing so until it is killed.


There are only 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary and those that don't.

Re: the bottomless monster

Monsters in said films would kill and eat humans, and not an ounce of blood would be seen trickling from its mouth.

Giant snakes and other earthly predators would gain incredible intelligence and take on a very human trait of vengeance.


Sledge
"Stick: A boomerang that doesn't work"
http://tinyurl.com/pjph9

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

Whenever someone is dying, someone will say "Don't you die on me now".

"Vampires will never hurt you."

Saving people crossing the street from very bad drivers

I always laugh at this one. Babies in strollers, children, little old ladies, the blind seem to be the target of uncaring speeding drivers. As the person tries to cross the street a car appears at the end of the block. The hero sees the car and the person crossing. But the driver and the victim never notice each other. The hero sprints at full speed and tackles or scoops up the would-be-victim and saves them from the oblivious driver. The driver never slows down and continues on his merry way as if nothing happened.


There are only 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary and those that don't.

defeating a much bigger army/enemy

I've seen this one a lot. The heroes are greatly outnumbered. The enemy is vast and extremely capable. As a last ditch effort the hero of the story comes up with a plan. If the enemy are human then the hero challenges the leader to a one-on-one duel. The hero wins and the enemy army either retreats or then treats the hero as their new leader. If the enemy is not human then the plan is still to kill the leader/queen/brain of monsters. Sometimes all the monsters die for some reason when this happens and sometimes they just scatter.


There are only 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary and those that don't.

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

The usage of the hero walking away from an area, and then the area behind him exploding 10 seconds later; usually a car blowing up.

Also, in a comedy movie, often a kid's movie, when a goofy character is fixing something, it explodes with a cheesy smoke effect, and their face is black with their hair blackened and sticking up (almost like a mad scientist).

Re: All time greatest clichés part 2

Don't know if it's been said,

but whenever someone (usually the hero) has been hit with something, they always seem to "accidentally" throw their weapon/something they have in their hands halfway across the room.

In which they have the famous camera shot showing how far away that character is from his weapon.


Why can they never hold on to whatever they're holding?

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