Mysterious Skin : Movie hit me pretty hard

Movie hit me pretty hard

Had I watched this film a year ago, it probably would've been just horrifying. About a year back off I came out to my folks, so I guess I was feeling pretty good about myself. During this up time I had offhandedly remarked to a friend of mine "You know I don't really remember much from before I was 8" after I was mentioning a few stories from when I was younger. So jokingly he says "I do, you were probably molested" (I know sick joke, neither of us really care for over political correctness). So I chuckle.. then immediately I;m stunned, and fragments of memories come flooding back. So I tun over to my friend and say "Uh I think I was, I'm not kidding you're gonna have to stop talking for a few minutes, I need a breather". This turns my good time into wel pretty much a nightmare, every bit of feeling good about myself pretty much left, from then on just inner turmoil. I have since dealt with that for the most part, accepted it, moved on. Unfortunately there's no running from your past and lately the molester has been trying to contact me via Facebook, and I'm not sure what to do with that just yet, as I've never told him I know.

Some of the striking similarities are the fact that for as long as I could remember I was attracted to older guys. Before or after the incident I couldn't honestly tell you, wish I knew but I accept that. At the same time for a pretty damn long time I was pretty much just an empty person, pretty nerdy and reclusive. I've since developed social skills, I'm 25 now, going to university, got a job, live with 3 other students, overall things are pretty good. Just watching this film I felt a great deal of empathy and sadness all around. It's been a year since I started to remember, glad I watched this now. I think it was good to be able to watch something like this, bring back a flood of emotions and still walk out remembering things are ok now.

Re: Movie hit me pretty hard

Thank you for sharing your story! I hope that one day you find the courage to not only confront him, but to ensure the person his comeuppance! Until then, I just want to give you an encouraging, virtual hug!

And I am happy you have found a balance in your life! It bodes well for your future :-)

Re: Movie hit me pretty hard

I don't know what to say but I want to say something because I think it's so great you are letting yourself be happy! Would give you a hug if I could.

Re: Movie hit me pretty hard

Thank you for sharing yoru story, The_sun_is_up. I'm glad this film and its beauty has helped you come to terms with things. It's a beautiful piece of brutally honest art.

I'm sorry you had to go through what you've gone through.

Troll the respawn, Jeremy.

Re: Movie hit me pretty hard

I'm very sorry for what you suffered, and am glad you're getting better. I often wonder if I have repressed memories as well, as I have often told people I don't remember anything before I was 5 years old, and not much else between the ages 6 to 12 either. I thought it was normal for children to forget their childhoods, but my sister and friends were always weirded out when I mentioned that, and could remember a lot of things I couldn't, like our first house. Sometimes I have a memory of an older male neighbour giving me a mug, but I don't remember much else, and I don't think I want to either. I don't plan to risk bringing up false memories, and if I've survived any trauma I might have had by repressing it and ending up with anxiety and poor social skills so be it... Not worth the depression of remembering.

Re: Movie hit me pretty hard

Thanks for sharing your story. I definitely relate to it pretty strongly. I watched this movie freshman year of college, and I had very limited memories from when I was about 11 or younger. Watching the film, I was sucked in like I never have been while watching a movie. By the middle, I felt as though I was living through Brian. Like Brian, I was definitely socially awkward most of my life; though not even close to the same level. I also was afraid of physical intimacy, though I was a pretty open person and wasn't afraid of talking about sexual things.


Anyways, I started to have recurring dreams after the movie. While it wasn't about specific moments, several adult figures in my lives popped up. All had prominent roles in my life, but I had forgotten about them completely. This includes a pastor, babysitter, and, strangely enough, my little league baseball coach from when I was pretty close to Neil's age. A few months later, I ingested a certain fungus for the first time. In a short span of time, it was like I was relieving moments from my seminal years that were blocked out for a very long time. Vivid memories of things my pastor and babysitter did to me was the most intense thing I've ever experienced. I didn't have a vision about my coach, so I think the weird memories about my coach appeared because of the baseball theme of the movie. Especially since I sucked at sports. Weirdly enough, I found my team baseball photo in my parents basement, and my coach looked just like coach from the movie porno stache and all. I swear to God this is all true... sometimes truth is truly stranger than fiction.
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