They closed her out and her bubble was burst.
"she didn't respect his unresolved feelings?"
Oh, come on, lol. You can't successfully seduce a man who doesn't want to be seduced.
Thank goodness for women like her in the past who were active agents in their lives, who weren't happy to just settle for whatever tradition said they could have, who bucked the definition of what it meant to be feminine in their time, and who railed against the double standards of gender.
'he could have done worse'
I personally don't think that Demelza ever had any intention of letting Ross know how she felt about him until HE kissed HER first. Once he did, and she had a good idea that he was attracted to her too she decided to follow her feelings.
I am absolutely against any logic that follows the "men will be men so it's up to the women to help them behave and it's the women's fault if/when they don't".
Now obviously Demelza isn't planning to lead some feminist revolution, lol.
I think they were both very aware of how they felt about each other. They were definitely headed in the right direction however, he was not there yet. He ended the moment, went in his room for the night and closed the door. She pursued him. I call that seduction. In no way did I excuse Ross.
She decided to seduce him, and it was a seduction when Ross was particularly susceptible. Yes, it takes two to tango but Ross would not have slept with her if she didn't enter his room.
Then we come to the interesting question as to why Ross decided to marry Demelza when no one would have expected it of him. Was it as he stated "To satisfy an appetite, to save myself from being alone, because it was the right thing to do? I had few expectations at best you'd be a distraction, a bandage to ease a wound." Or was it that despite her humble background that she fit into his life like no one else did. She was his life mate, a person that he could work along side with the same goals and desires from life. She grounded him, she gave him a reason to strive for more, he must have instinctively known that she would always love him and always support him.
He stated, "To satisfy an appetite? To save myself from being alone? Because it was the right thing to do? I had few expectations. At best you'd be a distraction; a bandage to ease a wound."
to become a nurse maid to his next brood of children
after their first kiss Ross knew that he couldn't look at Demelza the same way he had always looked at her, she was now someone he was attracted to.
I agree that Ross might not have slept with Demelza that night but now he knew he was attracted to her and that their relationship could never be the same.
Come on now, it's disingenuous to suggest that I was implying that.
She revived the moment and Ross was not able to resist this time.
Thanks for that although I think you gave her credit for getting us the right to vote.
I stand by my assertion that Ross gave in because he wanted to, just like he kissed her in the first place, sparking the whole thing, because he wanted to kiss her.
Going back to my original complaint, what bothered me is that Demelza created the situation wherein Ross, being a gentleman, was forced to marry her.
This after he overlooked all the problems she caused in the family. I think she should have stopped questioning his love after all that stuff. He always treated her with love and kindness, not just as someone he married, someone who cooked, cleaned and had sex with him.
I guess I'm suggesting that she would not feel this way had they waited until Ross came to see his thing with Elizabeth was something long gone, never to return. You can get to that state, first love or not.
I don't see how she could question his love after all they've been through together.
So much for her fiery independence.
Going back to my original complaint, what bothered me is that Demelza created the situation wherein Ross, being a gentleman, was forced to marry her. It also created the situation wherein Demelza kept questioning his love and commitment to her. Even in the most recent episode, she was talking about it wearing her trademark furrowed brow. (So much for her fiery independence.)
I'm saying that she created the situation with her fiery independence and then whimpers up a storm if Ross is in the same room with Elizabeth, speaks to her or mentions her name. If you're going to create a situation, be prepared to deal with the outcome.
For a fiery, independent, strong woman she never confronts him or even engages in a frank discussion regarding Elizabeth.
If you're going to create a situation, be prepared to deal with the outcome.
`I'd be surprised at nothing you think or do except that. You came here as a miner's daughter, married into this ancient derelict family, took its standards as your own. So you mistake your own value, your own vitality, even your value to Ross. There are two qualities in blood; Demelza.-There's the quality of family : and the quality of freshness. Ross was a wise man when he chose you. If he's as sensible as I think he is, he'll realise it. If you're as sensible as you ought to be, you'll make him.'
Sorry, but once again this smacks of the notion that men are not accountable for their own bad decisions and it's the responsibility of women to keep them on their best behavior.
Fundamentally there was nothing meek or mild about her. She was a fighter, and it showed now.