Me Before You : Disabled People

As a wheelchair-user myself it worries me to think that there may have been recent accident victims in rehabilitation who not having had time to accept the change in their lives and recognise that one can lead a fulfilling life as a Disabled person, have been influenced by this movie to commit suicide . How awful it would be if that was the case.At any rate, this film is hardly one which will be helpful to the Disabled Community as we strive for equality and respect.

Gordon P. Clarkson

Well, then they should not watch any movies or read any books or watch the news; there's a lot of "killing people" involved there. They may be influenced by that, seeing how they're gullible idiots according to you, OP.

I am sorry you were unable to grasp the point I was making and consequently misunderstood it entirely .

Gordon P. Clarkson

Are you typically a fu*king as$hole, WoodCheese?

Only in response to people saying idiotic garbage such as OP's message that this movie inspires disabled people to commit suicide, and then acting passive-aggressive within a condescending message because I disagreed with his stupid attempt at a complaint.

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Well, then they should not watch any movies

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There aren't that many movies that depict glory in suicide such as this one.

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there's a lot of "killing people" involved there.

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Killing people is obviously different than ending your own life.

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They may be influenced by that, seeing how they're gullible idiots according to you, OP.

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OP never said that those people are gullible or idiots. OP also mentioned that he/she is a wheelchair-user.

Your reply was a red herring. I think it's safe to say that you did misunderstand OP's point.

Then, you continued on to try and insult OP's English, without explaining what exactly was so wrong with it. While yours isn't all perfect, his English is obviously irrelevant to the topic. It just made you seem like a troll.

People are inspired by what they see, in one way or another. It is probable that out of the millions viewers, some are actually inspired to be more inclined to suicide. To say that no one could be affected by this movie is definitely not empirical at all.

I appreciate what you are trying to say, but it was explained in the film that he had tried to get his life back on track, but in his case he was unsuccessful in doing so, there are many successful stories of people who find themselves immobile for one reason or another such as Stephen hawking, the many wheelchair based athletes, and rene Kirkby the actor with spina bifida to name just a few, don't be too disheartened by this story, as there are so many great triumphs! out there to be heard

I think it's valid to say everyone's experience with paralyzation is different.

OP have you ever seen "Whose Life is it Anyway?" It's about a quadriplegic who wants to end his life but the hospital won't release him to his own care. The man must sue for his own autonomy. My question then is this: how do you feel about this reversal; of someone or some agency having physical control over you and your life?

Not only might it convince some wheelchair bound man their life is not worth living, it also might make them think that a quirky but attractive woman is going to fall in love with them despite their predicament, which is just as potentially dangerous a lie.

I am always amused by the term "wheelchair bound" . It sounds like it is describing a piece of bondage equipment rather than an aide which enables us to get around and which wheel chair users regard as a very positive thing .

Most of us do not see our Disability as some kind of affliction and lead very fulfilled lives. I certainly don't think that our "predicament" as you call it, precludes attractive people falling in love with us . I say that as a Disabled man who has been married to a non-Disabled person for 27 years.

Gordon P. Clarkson

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I am always amused by the term "wheelchair bound"

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There are half a dozen ways I could describe it, this seemed the most apt, I am not in control of how you interpret it.

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I say that as a Disabled man who has been married to a non-Disabled person for 27 years.

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That's all well and good, but you have to realise that modern women have had 3 decades more feminist/hypergamist/ego-stroking WAW propaganda than your lovely wife. So whatever dating options a person in your situation (is that less offensive than "predicament"?) may have had 30 year ago are next to zero today.

Disabled people prefer "wheelchair user" . I can't speak for anywhere else in the World , but I can honestly say that in the UK at least, these more enlightened times are a much better for Disabled people than a generation ago. People are far more accepting of diversity and less inclined towards prejudice than when I was growing up. I have to admit that women are significantly more progressive than men with regards to Disability issues although of course , one should not generalise too much. Lol , I don't think my Wife would be too pleased to be told that she less discerning than younger women.

Gordon P. Clarkson

Totally agree. I think it is good to accept what life gives even if it is so awful,but life's still beautiful and this story of that man who had an amazing chance to live but refused because of his memories when he was healthy this is too selfish and how it inspirates people who has even worse sotuations? I think that a clever man should live just because of his parents,there is no harder pain than to loose a child. Life is one and how hard it is man should accept it

OP I agree with you. I thought the message in this movie was complete BS

We are more than a Body. And I'm not talking soul.

About 10 years ago I became friends with two women around the same time who both happened to have disabled daughters. One I met online and one IRL. It has been an eye opening experience.

We all have something to give. We all have a value. This movie left me feeling sick.

I think the message there is clear on the title, "Me before you" meaning Will life before Lou, before all that's happened to him, that person was the real Will, that's the person he does identify with. When Lou arrived in to he's life made it better for sure but on he's point of view that's not the life he, or her for that matter, wanted to live. He was all a bout living the life to the full ( doing things, extreme sports, going to places etc) and what he had become was the complete opposite of what he wanted to be and there was no ending, no solution.

Now lots of intelligent people will understand that each Whi has a desirability for one or other reason has different experience, different background, different history behind. Now days you can live a very happy life even if you don't have the full use of your limbs. There is a lot of things you can do and society still evolving and adapting to different kind of disability, hence this movie would not inspire a suicide unless the person has thought about suicide before and he doesn't see any option in their life.

I say that if a disabled person watches this film and chooses to end his/her life then he/she had problems before the disability occurred.

I'm not saying that people aren't influenced by things they watch or hear, but there has to be a predisposition. I've seen Fast and Furious but I don't want to drag race.

I understand what you're driving at, but do give credit to the disabled viewers to make their own decisions independent of this film. As Will stated in the film, "It's my body that's paralyzed, not my mind. Yet."

Personally I think that if someone lets something like this influence their decision they're a *beep* idiot. In his situation it makes sense to me. He is unhappy. Constantly in pain. This is just one portrayal. There are others. Many positive that deal with what someone would feel like. I can think of two off the top of my head. Honestly people should do what feels best for them. It's no one else's business what they choose either.

You made a really good point. Not all wheelchair users have the same experience. A paraplegic, for example, is still able to move their arms. While Will Traynor is paralysed from his shoulder down, and has constant pain because of his spinal cord condition. Two very different situations; one can do many things that the other can't. Obviously the first one has more chances of being happy than the latter.

However, I think ANYONE can fall into a circumstance that could lead them into taking some decisions that others can't possibly imagine they would. It's not fair to call those people idiots. Unless you have been in their shoes, you shouldn't judge them.

There are millions of people who have seen or will see this movie. There is always a chance that some of them, having the same or worse condition than Will Traynor, be inspired by this movie. It usually isn't instant. Inspiration works by giving you ideas. Ideas of possibilities which you weren't aware of before. Over time, that idea can grow and influence your decisions. For example, imagine a 16 year old quadriplegic, who has been in constant pain for more than a couple of years. Never had put much thought about his future, until he saw this movie. It made him think. Think about the next 50 years. No hope of ever getting the life he wanted. Being in constant pain for the next 50 years. Not knowing for certain if anyone is still going to be around to take care of him. He never thought of killing himself, until he saw how beautiful the ending of this movie was. He never knew that there are places in the world that offer services for euthanasia such as the one in the movie. Seeing this movie might spark his interest in researching about euthanasia. It might not happen any time soon, and the catalyst could be something else, like the death of a close relative.

I guess the best thing to do is to not underestimate the possible impact of this movie on people. Not just people in wheel-chair; a lot of people have had thoughts of suicide. But it doesn't mean that the movie itself is bad or is a bad thing. We can all learn some positive things from it.

I just think people who let something like this influence them aren't looking at things as a whole. You can't just make a rash decision. To some degree you have to be a mix of both the emotional and objective. Some people would rather live in pain and be alive, but some can't handle that. I think it's a decision that is deeply personal and should be 100%. In this movie I didn't find the ending beautiful. At least not because of his death. I looked at it more as a personal awakening of her. That and the fact it was real love. Not selfish, and based on intelligent feelings.

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I just think people who let something like this influence them aren't looking at things as a whole. You can't just make a rash decision.

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I agree with this. However, it's always easier said than done. I believe everyone will at some point made at least one decision that isn't the best one for them.

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Some people would rather live in pain and be alive, but some can't handle that.

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Depends on the degree of pain and situation. Everyone has their own limit. Has it ever crossed your mind that the pain that they're going through could be beyond your imagination?

My point is, I agree that we should not give up and always strive for life, but at the same time, we shouldn't underestimate the suffering that others are going through. For someone who is in pain most of the time, and can't see any hope that they can get any better, sometimes all it takes is a little nudge.