Film General : Signature Lines I'll Never Get To Use *sniff*

Signature Lines I'll Never Get To Use *sniff*

I've been using these boards since October 2002 . . . still can't believe that they're going away. Very sad about that.



Anyway, when I first started I used “Goodness! People come and go so quickly here!” as my signature line. I thought it was cute and very appropriate for the internet. When I began here I thought I would use if forever, but then I found the joy of referencing other quotes and would change it around. My old lists of signature lines is in my profile. Just today I switched back to my first signature line, for old time's sake.

But I have a bunch of signature lines that I never got around to using, and now, as we know, I've run out of time. Since they never appeared as my signature, I figured that I'd post them just to get them up, if only for a little while. Some of them are too long (over a hundred characters), so I would have had to either cut and paste them in or just work to shorten them, but since I'm just putting them here I'll leave them too long:

Christmas Themed ones I would have used in 2017 or later:

Sometimes for Christmas we all share a baloney sandwich . . . without the baloney, of course.

Why? Because you rode a hedgehog to work and I got here on a talking moose. That’s my name!

We've established the fact the lodge is ideal.

Must be an old sheepshearing song!


Other signature lines that I would have/might have used someday . . . I always add to this (the last one just got added last week) so they probably all wouldn't have gotten chosen, but I'll put them up:

Latersville!

I’ll go back and get the little boat!

I don’t like crooks. And if I did like ‘em, I wouldn’t like crooks that are stool pigeons. And if I did like crooks that are stool pigeons, I still wouldn’t like you!

Did Adolph Caesar have a Napoleon complex?

Oh, that Dennis. He sure is a menace.

Win With Woodrow!!!

Are my eyes really brown?

Where da white women at?

So what now, Jack Sparrow? Are we to be two immortals locked in an epic battle until Judgment Day and trumpet sounds?

Class dismissed! . . . Class undismissed. . . . Class redismissed!

That’s a big Twinkie.

Is it me, or are rap songs just getting lazier?

You know I used to live like Robinson Crusoe? I mean, shipwrecked among 8 million people. Then one day I saw a footprint in the sand, and there you were.

If you say ‘three’, mister, you’ll never hear the man count ten!

Impetuous! Homeric!

On a day like this I can only say one thing: Gentlemen, the drinks are on the house. . . . Well, they are!

In that case, it is a pleasant evening, and we will have a drink with you!

M&Ms – Nature’s Perfect Food

Now go away before I taunt you a second time.

Nice one, centurion. Like it, like it.

As old as my tongue and a little bit older than my teeth.

I've met a lot of hard-boiled eggs in my time, but you--you're twenty minutes.

Our beautiful, beautiful Cathedral.

His chops are too righteous! The helmets can't handle this level of rock 'n' roll!

I woulda worn my tuxedo but my polo pony ate it!

I hear it’ll go away if you rub it with a potato . . .

Better to be king for a night than a schmuck for a lifetime.

I can’t hear you in this noisy railroad station, all alone.

At least that Jimmy Stewart version of ‘Mr. Smith Goes to Washington’ had that giant rabbit who ran the Savings & Loan!

Are you Portugese too?

Oh, is this more what you’re accustomed to: Hey, Sparkles, twenty bucks enough?
Not half enough, buddy!

You’re not the one he spends tortured nights dreaming about!
He said that?!
Nah, I’m just assuming.

Strange things are afoot at the Circle K.

You speak treason.
Fluently!

Yay, I’m a llama again! . . . . Wait . . .

Some days you can’t get rid of a bomb!

And if a merry meeting is to be wished . . . God prohibit it!

You know me . . . I’m just like you. It’s two in the morning and I don’t know nobody.

Let's get something straight, kid. The only reason you're still conscious is because I don't want to carry you.

The closer we are to danger, the farther we are from harm . . . It’s the last thing he’ll expect.

May their days be long, and full of happiness.
May their children be many, and full of health.
And may they live in peace, and freedom.

Unhand that savage you – you – you savage!

I am not a brown-noser. My nose, um, just tans faster than the rest of me!

Tut tut, looks like rain!

Don’t join a cult . . . have some cake!

And now...heeere’s Chevy!
Oh, God, Brian, we messed up bad. We messed up real bad!

Oscar winning Cuba Gooding Jr. in his first film since Jerry Maguire.
Gooding certainly knows how to pick scripts!

I don't know half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.

Is he as cute as you are?
Nobody is.

And I'll even throw in a free soft drink for an extra three dollars!

He bit Dakota Fanning on the face!
When you hear his version, she was kind of asking for it.

Fat mice with pocket watches?

It’s not the heat, it’s the humanity.

Give her my love.
I'd give her my own if she had that on.

No, the school song was ‘something something alma mater’.
They don’t write ‘em like that anymore.

Gravity ... she's a harsh mistress.

No pun intended.
None comprehended.

How could he do that? It’s not physically possible!
In New Jersey, anything can happen.

Am I the only one here who respects the writing?

Well, see you around the habadashers!

I can't see their faces.
Well, they've been told not to look into the tomato can.

Next you’ll be saying that Hitler was a racist.

Who figures an immigrant is gonna have a pony?

No. I just think your behavior is arrested.
I ain’t never been arrested in my whole life!

What has gotten into you lately? Save a little craziness for menopause.

This is a sin - a wicked indulgence . . . Didn't they have any butter pecan?

Sort of looks like a queen, doesn't she?
Like a queen oughta look.

There’s a reason it's not against the law to cheat on your spouse. Our jails aren't big enough.

Oh, yeah – the hat.

A doctor on the golf course? What will we see next, a cop eating a donut?

I began to feel like some wild thing caught in a snare.

These drugs can interact.
No, I keep them in separate bottles.

He was a tubby little chap who looked as if he had been poured into his clothes and had forgotten to say ‘when’!

The petting zoo closes at two, and the goat roast is at three.

Ladies of the Battered Women Shelter, please be quiet - a man is talking.

Maybe you just want to fly the plane yourself. Well, good luck pressing ‘Take Off’, then ‘Autopilot’, then ‘Land’.

Ladies of the Susan B. Anthony Hotel . . . Weclome.

Looks like I’m not having any mayonnaise.

I got a cold the size of the Chicago stockyards.

Some town to be broke in.
What town isn’t?

I’m a General – wheee!





“Goodness! People come and go so quickly here!”
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